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Wednesday, June 3, 2020
Taiwan

Apple Addresses Growth — Buys Taiwan

Cupertino, CA Tim Cook today reassured investors that Apple is taking its slowing growth in the China market seriously by outright purchasing Taiwan. "Purchasing...

You Personally Are Holding Up Entire Company

Dallas, TX -- I am totally blocked right now. This is urgent. URGENT. !!!! Did you change something? I have not changed anything. This...

Jamaican Culture Successfully Commercialized

Falmouth, Jamaica -- Trump University scientists announced today that they have finally reduced the rich, complex culture of Jamaica into a successful commercial vehicle. "We proudly announce today that...

Executive Outsources Parenting Responsibilities

Austin, TX -- Rod Templestein, an executive at Floosbin, recently selected a suitable supplier to outsource the parenting of his only son, Jayce. Templestein called a...
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