Lawyer Is Most Ethical, Respected Member of Trump Campaign

New York, NY -- Attorney Jared Johnson is by far the most ethical and respected member of the Trump for President campaign. "At first it...

Nation Ready For Facebook To Return To Cat Memes And Granny Spam

Akron, OH -- As the 2016 Presidential Election comes to a close, millions of Americans share a readiness for their Facebook feeds to return...

Latest Trump University Poll Has Trump Ahead By Like, 1,000 points

New York, NY -- The Trump University Poll of Public Opinion has found that Donald Trump is leading Hillary Clinton by like, 1,000 points. Professors...
Presidential Election Polling Location

States Approve Bars as Presidential Polling Locations

Austin, TX -- Citing the abysmal quality of this year's Presidential candidates, seven states so far have approved bars as presidential polling locations for...
Grandmother

Grandmother’s Assessment of Candidates: “Well, Bless Their Hearts”

College Station, TX -- Jason Tatum's Grandmother offered her considered opinion of the 2016 Presidential candidates by beginning her comments with "Well, bless their...

Congress Consults with Comcast to Improve Approval Ratings

Washington, DC -- Congress is consulting with Comcast on how to improve its dismal public approval rating by the American public. "Comcast is a true...
Donald Trump

Trump Nomination To Be Truly Multicultural

Cleveland, OH -- When Donald Trump is nominated in Cleveland, OH on July 21, 2016, he promises that the affair will be truly "multicultural"....

Sanders Brings Slingshot to Clinton Meeting

New York, NY -- Hillary Clinton, surrounded by her campaign advisors and donors, strode forth from her campaign headquarters after her recent primary victories...

Nicolas Cage To Hurl Trump’s Phone Into Volcano To Save Democracy

Washington, DC -- Nicolas Cage, sitting in counsel with his wisest friend, Gary Busey, determined this week that in order to save democracy, they...

Boris Johnson Files Suit Against Trump’s Hair

London, England -- Boris Johnson, the English politician also known as the "Blonde Bombshell", has filed suit against Donald Trump for exploiting his signature...